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Guest Blog Moist Blog

That’s right, I’m accepting guest bloggers! Today’s guest blog is brought to you by the Moist Man himself Mavros. I’ve know Mav since the days of the Taki Dictatorship in <Dead Gnomes Float> in the Burning Crusade. Mav and Taki have a hot steamy greek bromance in game that would make anyone moist. Or vomit. You choose. Together they ran <Broken> on Uldaman until a series of unfortunate events beyond their control led to the demise of said guild. Now they are entertaining the denizens of MT.

I’d like to add a disclaimer here that I did not write the post below. Anything said below this point may not be held against me (unless it’s held closely and gentle with soft nuzzles).

Reflections on the Cataclsym – By Mavros

For me personally, this xpac was my most wild ride since I started playing WoW.  Back in vanilla is a close second, I had a guild that split in half and then reformed and split again and I lost my DKP 3 times!  Anyway, more so than any other xpac, I was the cliché, 110% immersed in this xpac called Cataclysm, where Deathwing reigned terror on the world….ooooo…scary.  I was actually told he can’t really be dead as he is a god per the lore.  Lore shmore, I just want to clear raid content.  Oddly enough, I LOVED the actual Warcraft 1-3 lore immensely and am even playing Warcraft 3 for the 4th time and I watch every cut scene.  Somehow, the more doesn’t entice me in WoW whatsoever as it feels uninteresting in the MMORPG setting.  It doesn’t matter though, Blizzard has me hook, line, and sinker – yeah, more clichés.  Woot!  So, here are my memories/reflections of Cataclysm.  I did my best to recall it all, but between my many loose and moist bowel movements and lots of drinking, it may get fuzzy and I may cross timelines.

Cata release and the grind to 85

From the outset and release of Cata I speed leveled a pally as prot with a holy offspec, but holy would be my raid spec/main spec when I got to 85.  At 85, I tanked heroics as one of the guild tanks that was geared enough to be able to tank and get people geared.  I only really healed in 5 man heroic PUGs, which I love to do and I have eluded to this in the past as a way to fine tune your skills with unpredictable puggers and bad tanks.  It felt like an eternity to 85 with no guild perks or rest bonus, but I got finally got there with great disgust.  I fing HATE leveling with these horrendously boring kill 10 of these and come back then kill more until a piece of their nosehair falls out and collect 10 of those nosehairs and then come back AGAIN, THEN you can kill the boss of the noisehair clan and come back and I will give you a green piece of gear that will replace that epic purple from your last xpac that you spent weeks waiting for it to drop.  Yah!  I swore up and down I wouldn’t level more than a few 85s in Cata due to the awful grind to 85.  Spoiler alert:  I now have 10 85s and a 68 rogue that I just can’t level anymore.  /fme

At 85 and 329 ilevel (I think that was the ilevel needed), I most of all enjoyed the difficulty of the heroic 5 mans.  They truly felt….heroic!  I felt they were like vanilla and even TBC in difficulty.  CC was needed and using an entire healer arsenal was needed.  Then they nerfed them and I do understand why, I finally get the Blizzard model after so many years.  Anyway, 5 mans all became a face roll.  Luckily, the raids were there for the challenge, pre-nerf of course.  I hate that I have to use the word pre-nerf, but this is world of warcraft 2012.  Apparently everyone deserves to see end game….even Rakrah.

Weeks after Cata launch, Broken had enough to start running BWD and we formed 2×10 and started raiding.  Now the real fun would begin!


Sometime during Cata, I think 4.1, Blizz re-introduced ZA and ZG as heroic 5 mans for 353 gear.  Both were pieces of shit as raids in vanilla and TB  (20 man and a 10 man at the time), so seeing them again was like seeing my GI doctor. (check forums for the story of moist if you are unfamiliar with my GI doctor stories, they are shittastic!)  Like a good and obsessed altoholic, I ran ZA/ZG MORE THAN 200 times to completion (not counting partial runs) to get pre-raid BiS gear for all my alts (I do not know why except there was nothing else to do).  I went through all my dungeon achievements of all my toons to verify the number of completed ZA/ZG runs when someone in guild asked me how many times I ran them and I was shocked and horrified at the total number of ZA/ZG runs I had completed.  On some level, it was a low point for me and I can’t tell you how many people sucked at the last boss in ZG.  It was amazing at the fail, but I sort of chuckled at times.  Healing bad tanks and dpsers on that fight was truly challenging and oftentimes fun.


T11 Raiding and The great divide

So, Broken started raiding BWD with 2 groups.  It was quickly really apparent that some people couldn’t handle the demands of raiding after the culmination of ICC which you could spam anything and have noi mana issues or rage issues or whatever.  Mostly the healers struggled as in ICC mana was no issue and all of a sudden 25% through many boss fights some of the Broken healers were now oom and qqing.  /wtf Both groups hit walls.  A “super” grp was assembled to down Chogall, Al’Akir, and Nefarion all pre-nerf for the guild.  This was the beginning of the end of 2×10 for Broken.  It was abundantly clear some people were being carried through content and hurting any type of real progression that more than 50% of the guild desired.  The great divide of skill was more apparent than ever and more obvious than Rakrah being one of the worst tanks on the entre Uldaman server.  The call was heard by Officers and the GL and the decision was made to form one group and bring the worthy and the most committed to raid.  We never got more than a few heroics down in T11, Halfus and Chimareon.  Chimy was a tough fight on heroic.  We spent 2-3 full nights on it before we got it down, but it was a glorious victory when we did and sort of solidified this new focused group idea.  Of course, FL was coming and we all waited for that.  I think we could have done more T11 heroics with our new 1×10 progression focused group, but we merely ran out of time.


This tier was probably one of Broken’s best.  Getting all 7 bosses down pre-nerf.  Rag down the week before nerf.  That was a thrilling kill.  Vent exploded with cheers when we got it.  It felt damn good as it was not an easy fight and I slept really well.  I even woke up my wife to tell her.  She grumbled and told me to f off.  I tried to mount her, but she bucked me off.  In FL, I LOVED the Baleroc fight.  My favorite since healing Dreamwalker, the dragon in ICC, the mechanic of building stacks and then swapping to keep the tank up from HUGE dmg was different and awesome.  After the huge flat FL nerf, Broken did a good job at getting 6/7H rather quickly without really stumbling much.  Broken even beat Insomnia (one of Uldaman’s finest guilds now) to 6/7H before DS release was announced.  As a guild we decided to not even try H Rag which was deemed a guild killer plus we were sort of close to DS.  It was a crowning glory for the guild that unfortunately was short lived.

At the same time as being a member of Broken, I wanted to raid more and joined a weekend alliance guild called Dark Carnival on Ysera as a resto shaman (who was my least favorite healer, but have learned to “love”).  At the time DC was 6/7 Normal FL with only one rag kill.  I joined, as well as a few others to replace gquitters, and we got rag down a few weeks later, then drama ensued and I left the guild to join a startup guild called Evening of Score.  That grp/guild consistently downed reg Rag each week, but never got into heroics.  There was drama brewing and gkicks up the wazoo.  Trouble was on the horizon for this newly formed guild.

Dragon Soul

Broken hit the DS raid hard upon release as FL was as stale as poo.  I was away on travel, but wrote cliff notes for every DS normal fight that could be read within a minute or 2.  I want to say Broken got 6/8 in week 1, but cannot recall anymore (see paragraph 1 about too much drinking and pooing to remember clearly).  Then 7/8 and finally 8/8, all pre-nerf.  That was a milestone for the guild, all Cataclysm normal bosses downed pre-nerf and it wasn’t 1 week prior to nerfs like with FL and rag, so it felt like DS might be a bigger success than FL!  It felt good and Broken was paving the way to being something more than the casual guild back that started back in TBC that entered Kara with pvp gear!

At the same time, over in Evening of Score, that guild got to Spine and downed it FINALLY after having to carry a 3rd healer through it.  Unfortunately, not long after that, the next week actually, that guild broke up as startup guilds are a great idea in theory, but take way more than saying “we want a drama free raid environment” to be successful.  Drama is unfortunately part of this game.  Officers need to keep it in check, that is their primary job, they just don’t know it or deny it. J  Anyway, the leadership could not deal with the drama and the guild became unglued.  I was sort of RLing for them at the same time as RLing for Broken so it was a touch exhausting too.  RLing 5 nights a week.

So, after EoS went to shit, I transferred my shaman back to Uldaman and joined Masochistic Tendencies on my resto shaman and joined Yakk’s Sun/Mon group.  That group got the first DS Madness kill for the guild at 5% nerf.  We almost had it the week before, but we fell a little short and ran out of time.  I wanted it bad too.  I blame Giz, he wasn’t there , but his spirit must have been.

At the same time Broken was immersed in heroic DS.  H Morchok was a joke then we got to H Yorsack.  Broken got him after 40 tries at 0%.  2/8H at 0% wasn’t too bad and another milestone.  Broken then proceeded to go 6/8H all with a max of 10% DS nerf.  Then the guild unraveled.  It wasn’t H Spine as Broken barely got into it (maybe 4 pulls?), but the repetitive mistakes on H Hag and H Warm that led to finger pointing and comments like, “this should be farm” plus having unstable groups week after week hurt morale.  Add that to losing some of our long standing members due to burnout and the release of D3, and raids were too hard to maintain, so we shut it down for a bit.  It happens when you have a guild going for as long as Broken has been going and you drop down to one focused 10 man group with little to no real bench.  Broken tried to institute a 2nd group and recruit for it, but the DS boredom was in full effect now.  New recruits showed up once and disappeared.

After Broken stopped raiding and Yakk’s Sunday group disbanded, I helped the Wed/Thurs heroic group as a fill-in when spots were open.  Eventually my priest got a core spot in the group and that group is now 8/8H DS.  The kill was after 5.04 released, but a kill is a kill!

I also rejoined Dark Carnival on Ysera on my resto shammy where the guild went through a rename and became The Night Shift.  My recommendation was “Moist” and it received 2 votes.  1 by me and 1 by one other guy.  Anyway, they had just lost 5 core members and mass recruited.  After a 1-2 week gelling period we finished H DS at 25% and have been each week.  This was a personal milestone for me.  I had never downed ANY end boss on heroic or prior to heroics, no end boss at all in my wow career.  I am hoping to work off of this success and make it a goal of mine in each xpac and tier in wow from now on.  These challenges are what give me my endorphin rush and why I play this game of ours.

In Cata I had 216 total Heroic DS Kills with 10 H Madness (as of Sept 11).  This isn’t meant to tug on my epeen, but merely a snapshot of the involvement/commitment I had in this xpac at a personal level.  Prior to this release, my kill total was probably not even half of that in any one raid.  Add to that I raided with every one of my healers.  3 progressively and one as a filler or for group 2 raids.  A time consuming action packed xpac for me to say the least. More cliché!


Even with all the time spent in Cata, with only a few weeks left until MoP, I am pumped for it.  The talents, new raids, new 5 mans, all look and sound great so far.  Not looking forward to grinding to 90, but hopefully it won’t be as painful this time around.  I also can’t wait to create Mavrosmoist, my Monk moistweaver.

So, that is it, my personal reflections, trials, and tribulations from the Cataclysm.  Hoping to build on the fun I had in Cata in MoP and keep it rolling.


Categories: Guest Blogs
  1. Taki
    September 11, 2012 at 8:37 pm

    Mav = Raid Whore & Bed Wetter

    It was quite an experience all in all and I appreciate seeing it through your eyes. It tempts me to reach out to others for their views and memories, as it was a special thing to behold at times. I cannot and will not ever stop being the sick “Broken” fuck that I am, nor do I think you ever could either.

    I was chatting with Tom a few weeks ago at some gathering, and as usual WoW came up, even if briefly and he always harkens back to jumping online to raid while telling jokes about raping goats and getting drunk as fuck. It’s a crude synopsis, but provides a small glimpse into the world we lived. Times changed, we got more srzbz! We climbed the ranking charts and old friends fell away.

    Personally, I have a serious fondness for the ICC 25 days watching the banter in the DPS channel that was just utterly BRUTAL. But now look at what you did, I’m going be a sensitive vagina for days just thinking about it, blowing my nose on a hanky and wearing out my Vagisil tube.

    Here’s hoping we left an indelible stain on the minds of many and the server known as Uldaman.

    -the dictator

    ps: Can you bring some extra toilet paper up to bed?

  2. rakrah
    September 12, 2012 at 7:11 am

    it was meant as a personal reflection and so i dont forget what happened. i wish i did this for every xpac, but also i have not and most of those memories have been flushed away.

  3. Khardeen
    September 12, 2012 at 8:18 am

    Thanks for the recap Mav. It’s always cool to see how other people’s experiences go in this game. When my Ally-side guild that i led, Phoenix Rising, fell apart early into T11, it was really upsetting but i see things like this and it helps to know that its just part of the game and not to take it too personally. And I definitely like where I ended up and am looking forward to making a lot more noise in MT in mists than I did in this lame-duck Cata time. So look for me!

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