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Hello, My name is Aly, and I am (still) an Altoholic

August 26, 2013 3 comments

I may need help. Are there any support groups out there for altoholics? I should be grinding my Black Prince rep to exalted on my main (/hangs head in shame), but there’s only so much damage you can do as a tree. And I realized my survivability as feral is, well, not existent. So what am I doing in the last 2 weeks of 5.3? Leveling alts. I MUST MAX ALL THE THINGS!

Pynkki has made it to 90, my little DK who pretended to be a tank once. I made her a bunch of crafted PVP gear and then dumped her like a rotten potato. I’ll get back to her eventually. That was 90 #9. Like I said, I need help. What’s left? Rogue, Warrior, Monk. I’m a ranged healer, and rogue, warrior and monk is not what I do. I could have resorted to eenie meenie miney mo, but my rogue was already leveled to 80ish after another bout of ADHD boredom right before the Cataclysm expansion hit. So naturally, only needing…. uh… less levels than my level 30 warrior or level 14 monk, I dusted off my Snykki rogue, and let Sonne carry me to the Battlefield Barrens quests while I watch him kill ALL THE THINGS and I hovered safely above him on my … what the hell was I flying anyway? It doesn’t matter. I got 3 levels while AFK’d watching TV.

But when Sonne was done, I was left to my own devices in Uldum, 20% shy of level 84. I’d like to stop right here and say, I haven’t actually *done* anything with my rogue in about 2 years. After locating all my stabby buttons, I set out to Uldum, to kill this catpersonleader named Kevem. It went something like this:

Me: *sneaks up behind Kevem*

Me: *stabby stab stab*

Kevem: Bahhaha, you have GOT to be kidding….

*Snykki has died*

Kevem resets himself from 80% to full and stares at me with curiosity.

Me: Reassafriggin…grumble… ok let’s try this again.

Me: *sneaks up behind Kevem*

Me: *cheap shot, ambush, stabby stab stab*

Kevem: *looks around feeling a tickle*

Kevem: Oh THERE she is *punch to the face*

*Snykki has died*

Me: /g ok how the fuck do I play a rogue?

Star: Uh…. you sneak up behind him, stabby stab stab, win?

Me: I have been stabby stab stabbing and NOT winning!

Me: Fuck this shit Ima go pet battle.

*Star switches to her rogue*

Me: *flipping through my spellbook* Oh hey, I should use this poison button

Sonne: WHAT?! *dies laughing*

Me: *uses a poison thingie* Ok, lemme try this again!

Me: *Sneaks up on Kevem*

Me: *stabby stab stab*

Kevem giggles to himself

*Snykki has died*

Star: Alykiinnnns I’m here to help youuu! What spec are you using?

Me: Hell if I know!

Guild: ROFL

Me: err, Combat. Oh I suppose I need glyphs….

Star: I use subtlety try that! *runs down subtlety rotation*

Me: *switches to subtlety* Oh hey I have stuns!

Me: *Sneaks up behind Kevem*

Me: *cheap shot, ambush, stabby stab stab, kidney shot, stabby stab stab*

*Kevem dies*

Me: WHO’s THE BITCH NOW???? HAH!

I ding’d 84, and got the hell outta Uldum. By the way, the horde trek to Twilight Highlands never gets old. I tried it on the alliance side, and it was just basically a very non-eventful ride. There were no horde gunships attacking. There were was no goblins yelling at each other to DO SOMETHING! OH THE GOBLINITY! It was just, blah. So I’m happy to be a horde. /nods

Once I built the portal out of water cores and muck, I went off to bgs and pet battle. BGs are fun. I did absolutely no damage, but I snuck around the gold mine sapping a couple of hunters. That’s all I did. Sneak and sap and watched them run around throwing flares in a panic.  I’ll get her to 90 one way or another. Rogues suck. That is all.

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Categories: Classes, Confessions

Hello, my name is Aly, and I’m an Altoholic

June 21, 2013 3 comments

Before I begin, the nickname “Aly” came from my former main toon Alykii. I haven’t played Alykii in 2 expansions, but the name stuck. Not that I mind, it is still part of my real name. Just not the part that everyone in real life calls me. Anyway…

First and foremost, I’m a healer. When you ask me to dps, you do so at your own risk. When you ask me to tank, then you’re just asking for trouble. I heal. I play whack-a-mole on my vuhdo boxes, and take a lot of abuse. What Masochist wouldn’t enjoy the abuse anyway? Right? Right???

I actually started out on my hunter Alykki. It was shortly after TBC launched, and I wanted to play in Kara with the big boys. ((whips out my cane and hearing aid)) Back in those days we didn’t have those newfangled trap launchers, and the survival spec didn’t exist. I sucked on my hunter. Autoshot, melee stats… go!

So my paladin Alykii was born. I wasn’t planning on healing on her, I didn’t know what I was doing with her. But she ended up being my main healer from mid-BC through the end of Wrath.

I wasn’t always an altoholic. I stuck with my hunter for about a year before moving on to the paladin. And even then, my paladin was it heading into Wrath. It was mid-Wrath when I started leveling alts in earnest. I blame my guild. We were running 25 man Naxx in Blood Red Skies, but a full clear was hit or miss depending on whether or not we had at least 2 shadow priests in the group for the Instructor fight. So being the helpful little peon I was at the time, I started leveling a priest. But being the ADHD person I am, she didn’t make it to 80 before we moved on from Naxx. I wasn’t really into the priest, so she became my bank toon and I leveled my mage and warlock instead. Mages were fun easy. I leveled frost, then tried out that crazy frostfire spec everyone raved about. I couldn’t really get the hang of it, so I went arcane, which was a very good raiding spec back then.

But the next toon I got to 80 was my warlock. I’ve only played affliction on her, and that’s all I’ll probably ever play. When I started raiding with her, I was in the top 2 dps on Sartherian while still wearing blues.  So Lunatyk (now Inkky) became my regular raiding alt for a while. Until I leveled my mage and had more fun with that. Luna was then relegated to PVP bitch while Wykkid (now Blynkki) became my raiding alt. Ever play a mage on Sindragosa, then switch back to heals? And spamming what *was* the blink button to get out of her AOE, and realizing after you died that you were pounding your FOL button (which doesn’t work while you’re moving)? Yeah. Me neither.

Somewhere around Ulduar, Alykii became a viable tank. I’m not entirely sure how that happened. I think I was still in BRS and I was building a tank offspec in Naxx (before dual specs were introduced). Ulduar came out, someone in guild said “Aly you have a tank set, right?” I said “uhhh… sure”. Invite pops up and I’m summoned to Ulduar.

Me: Uh, I’ve never tanked before and I haven’t even killed Ignis yet

RL: Just pick up the adds and drag them through the fire and then into the water

Me: Sure!

How I managed to perfect the mechanics without having tanked or seen the fight before, I have no idea. And after that I somehow became a semi-regular pinch tank while full time healing.

When the ICC 5 mans came out, I decided to level my druid. Kykki was sitting at level 29 semi-twinked for kitty pvp. I got her to 80, geared up and healing ICC. At this point we were running 2 ICC groups and I was tanking one while healing the other. Going kersplat on Marrowgar the day ICC opened was quite amusing.

The WOTLK expansion was when my severe altoholism reared its ugly head. I wanted to level everything! By the time most of ICC was on farm, I had my paladin, mage, warlock, hunter and druid all at 80. As we were working through the frost wing, I leveled up Kynkki  my abandoned priest. I still planned on her being a shadow priest. Until we got to the Lich King fight. And me being a healer and all… well. Kynkki was all of a sudden my new “main”.

I didn’t like the paladin changes in Cataclysm, so I decided to retire Alykii for the time being. I started out by leveling Kynkki to 85. She turned into a holy priest because the holy changes looked pretty cool, despite the fact that everyone was whining that priests were “broken”. With the introduction of goblins as a playable race, I couldn’t wait to start leveling my brand new baby goblin shaman Twynkki. She was born and raised in Cata. After I got her to 85, I couldn’t figure out how to play her so she got shelved. I’m pretty sure the druid was next, followed by my mage, warlock, paladin and hunter.

After the whole Deathknight novelty wore off, I decided to start leveling a DK. At this time, I had changed my mage’s name to Blynkki because.. well… she blinks. It was more appropriate to my naming scheme to name my mage Blynkki. Besides, there was another blood elf mage named Wykked running around pretending to be me. It’s like when you show up to the high school dance wearing the hottest dress you could find, but then some heather shows up wearing the same dress and looks better in it. And then you glare at each other, hiss and pretend you’re still a special snowflake.

After I race changed Blynkki to a goblin, the sub-naming scheme dawned on me. Luna became Inkky and was turned into a goblin. The DK was a goblin named Pynkki (and I wanted to give her pink pigtails but goblins didn’t have pink hair, so she ended up with purple pigtails, which in certain light looks almost pink). So I had Blynkki, Inkky and Pynkki. I also had Kynkki and Twynkki. Shortly before Cataclysm hit, I also leveled a rogue Snykki. She made it to 80 and… is still 80. At this point I was up to 8 level 85’s. But something was missing….

At the end of Cataclysm, I did the unthinkable. I rolled a warrior. I haven’t gotten very far with her yet. But she’s a goblin named Klydde. At last, my Pac-Man goblin family was complete!

(yes, I have issues)

At this time I had 4 healers – Kykki, Kynkki, Alykii and Twynkki. And Pynkki was a tank! Well… I use “tank” in a very loose sense of the word.

And then MOP hit. In the beginning, this expansion was the alt-killer. The grind to 90 sucked. The grind to gear and get ready for raiding sucked. The rep grinds sucked. The dailies sucked. LFR sucked. But we all knew that Blizzard would eventually make it easier on us.

So Kykki was it for a while. My lone 90. My main. Of course, that wasn’t going to last.

Twynkki was next. She turned into a lava spewing electrocuting hot little panda. I was gearing her for both heals and dps. DPS’ing was pretty fun. Healing, not so much. Resto shamans sucked across the board. I sucked even more because I just couldn’t play a resto shaman. My healer instincts were there, just the button pushing, not so much.

So what the hell, let’s level the mage! Mages not being able to be arcane anymore made me sad. Trying to play as a fire mage made me sadder. And nerd ragey. And all my responses to my hideous mage dps was “Ima healer lemme alone!” So I leveled the hunter. I leveled the hunter not to actually play her, but to max out leatherworking. See, I’m not just an altoholic, I’m also a profession ho. I must max all the things! So I did. Which meant I also had to level my priest who was a tailor/bs. Suddenly I have 7 level 90s…. err…. I mean 6. Yeah… 6. That you know of! bwahahaha!

Oh alright. I pulled a Reluu and leveled a 2nd druid. A secret 2nd druid. Shhhh. Her portrait is blue. I had to do it! I had to have the nerdpoints! I never leveled another toon on *that* side of the fence before. Granted, I cheated because my sister leveled it to mid 60s on my 2nd account, and I resurrected the account and an immediate boost to 80. So I really went only 10 levels. Don’t judge! /hangs head in shame

But Kykii is another tree. Yes, I must have two trees. Shaddup. I’ll eventually move her back to the good guys side. But leveling Kykii was really an experiment in masochism. See, I leveled her by questing. As resto. Talk about painful. Around 89 I just couldn’t kill shit, so I sucked it up and made the OS switch to boom. Yes, I still hate boom. Her OS will either be bear or kitty. Yes, I must have 2 kitties. Shaddup.

So that’s the history of my altoholism. I do have a level 74 priest (yes, another one) on the horizon. Yes I need two of those too.

My name is Aly, and I’m an altoholic.

Categories: Classes

Holy 5.4 Druid Changes Batman!

June 12, 2013 1 comment

After reading the recent wave of 5.4 patch notes, I felt compelled to make a post about this, since I play a resto druid. And I just dinged my 2nd druid to 90 as well. I wanted the Double Agent achievement dammit. No, I’m not okay.

This post is going to be from the Tree point of view. Why? Because I haven’t played a kitty since Cata and I didn’t want to look like a derp making shit up… and boom makes me want to punch a squirrel. Don’t even get me started about tanking.

So let’s dive right into it, shall we?

Dream of Cenarius Redesign

Restoration: Causes Wrath to deal 20% more damage and heals a nearby friendly target for 100% of the damage done.

I’m not a disco priest (well I have 2 of those as well but that’s beside the point). I’m still not going to choose this talent over Nature’s Vigil. Especially with the NV buff!

Heart of the Wild Tweak

Heart of the Wild when activated, now also provides a 25% bonus to healing for Restoration Druids.

I would likely never shift out of healing to take on another role. Unless we’re up against an insane enrage timer and we need that oomph. Even then I probably won’t take this over NV. See above.

Nature’s Vigil Buff

Nature’s Vigil when activated, causes healing spells now trigger an additional heal on a nearby ally for 25% of the amount healed. This is in addition to the existing effect where it damages a nearby enemy target for 25% of the healing done.

This is still the go-to talent for trees. NV already provides a flat 10% healing increase in addition to doing some damage. Before, only damage would trigger the additional heal on a nearby ally. This is allowing our healing spells to do it as well. Yes please.

Soul of the Forest Buff

Soul of the Forest has been partially redesigned to make it more attractive to Balance, Guardian, and Restoration Druids.

For trees, this increases the haste bonus by 100%, up from 75%. This is still the weakest talent behind Incarnation and Force of Nature. I would consider this talent if I didn’t have the 5% haste buff in the raid. This would make me a very grumpy tree indeed. Incarnation and FON are just too powerful not to use either one of them.

Ysera’s Gift

Ysera’s Gift, a new talent healing the Druid for 5% of their maximum health every 5 seconds. If the Druid is at full health, it will heal the most injured friendly target nearby instead. This talent fills the spot vacated by Nature’s Swiftness.

Nature’s Swiftness is now a spell for all! No longer a talent. Yay! So this new spell, I can see it having its uses. It’s like a priest’s desperate prayer, only way better. The other two talents in this tier are Renewal (which is a carbon copy of Desperate Prayer, and only really useful for questing or for other specs) and Cenarion Ward. CW has its uses as well, so I can see it coming down to choosing between CW and YG. CW would be helpful for incoming tank damage (like Horridon’s enrage). Otherwise, YG looks like one of those nice cast-and-forget-it type spells that you don’t even have to think about. Add it to your bar/buttons and cast when your other shit’s on CD.

Genesis

Genesis is a new Restoration spell learned at level 88. Genesis targets all party or raid members within 60 yards and accelerates the casting Druid’s Rejuvenation effects, causing them to heal and expire at 400% of the normal rate. Costs the same amount of mana to cast as Rejuvenation.

This is pretty sexy for some situations. I’m looking at Meg’s rampage, Tortos’s Quake and other situations of massive AOE damage. Blanket rejuv, cast Genesis and BAM. No more yelling at my screen “REJUV FASTER!” when my other CDs are on CD. I’m looking forward to playing around with this on the PTR.

Wild Mushroom Nerf

Wild Mushroom: Bloom is no longer capable of critical strikes, and accumulates overhealing done by Rejuvenation by 100%, down from 150%. Overhealing bonus no longer benefits from Naturalist or Mastery: Harmony.

WM buff in 5.3, we hardly knew ye. I loved you. I would have loved you forever. But then you went and broke my heart. And I’m sad. Did I mention that we only get one mushroom now? It does the same thing as three, supposedly. But I’m shaking my fist at you Blizzard. Show us the love then… be a big meanie. And with this nerf, comes the baffling glyph…..

Glyph of Efflorescence

New Glyph: Glyph of Efflorescence increases the healing done by Swiftmend by 20%, causes the Efflorescence healing effect to be triggered by Wild Mushroom instead of Swiftmend, and lasts as long as the Wild Mushroom is active.

So, let me get this straight. SM is buffed by 20% but doesn’t lay down the green circle of awesome. This would also mean that the treants from FON will also lose the effect. But this would also mean that the treants would get the 20% SM buff as well. But they only cast it on one target, then they go to HT.  The green circle of awesome then is triggered by planting a mushroom instead, and lasts up to 5 minutes (which is the current life of a mushroom if not bloomed). So players can just bounce in and out of the green circle. Like anyone will pay attention to that. Ha. So… hmmm… situational glyph at best. Biggest benefit will be when players are grouped up. Otherwise, why bother? I am so confused by this glyph I don’t even…

Innervate

Glyph of Innervate now causes Innervate to give both the Druid and the target 60% of the normal effect of the spell if it’s cast on a target other than the Druid.

Didn’t we used to have this? Back in T11 Star and I used to swap innervates all the time. We got more mana back that way. And then Blizzard took it away and nerfed it to the ground. Thank  you for bringing it back!

Miscellaneous Updates

Mass Entanglement no longer has a limit on the number of targets that could be affected, up from 5. PVP druids across Azeroth thank you. Otherwise, who cares?

Swiftmend’s area-of-effect healing effect is now called Efflorescence. Uhhhhh……. da fuck were we calling it before?? I mean *I* called it “Green Circle of Awesome* but…. wasn’t this ALWAYS called Efflorescence? /headscratch.

And there you have it! Lotsa Druid changes on the horizon. This is all still in test, so Blizzard reserves the right to scrap any or all of this. And I’ll be playing on the PTR because… holy shit that’s a lot of changes.

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